Walking Thoughts
On my drive home from work today I came to the realization that I will be 20 in 5 months. Normally, I think, “Hey, it’s just another age,” but today it feels different. My niece will no longer be able to say, “You’re not an adult; you’re still a teenager.” In 5 months I will leave childhood behind. I do believe that many adults are children in disguise and I hope to hold onto that childhood spark my entire life. However, there are changes that you undergo as you grow.
When I got back, I went for a walk around town. I ended up visiting my favorite childhood haunts. My backyard opens up onto the college junkyard. There was a huge mountain of dirt that the college would use in landscaping and I would use in my adventures. There were piles of broken concrete from torn down buildings that the college had nowhere else to put. There were old pieces of machinery that were perfect to climb on. And old playground equipment that wasn’t safe to use anymore; not in the conventional way at least. That was my playground. My best friend would come over and we would play for hours in the junk yard. I don’t know how many times I came home from my adventures with cuts or scrapes or bruises. Walking back through there now I’m surprised nothing worse happened.
Today I climbed around the piles of cement, exploring the small corners where people have made forts to play in. I climbed to the top of the big cement blocks and sat on the top feeling like the king of the world. My mind immediately entered into my adventure mode and there was a mini adventure story running through my head as I wandered through that junkyard playground. It was transformed into a desolate land that I had to journey through in order to survive.
Maybe it was the mood I was in, or the decisions I’m facing in my life right now, but that walk felt like a kind of goodbye. I know I will never lose that imagination or wonderment or playful attitude. But I don’t know how much longer I will call this place home.
Three Hills will always feel like home. Every time I come back to see my family or to recuperate from my latest adventure it feels safe. But I’ll never be happy living here. Today I realized that means I’ll eventually be saying goodbye and there are many things that I’ll miss. But I’m also really excited for what comes next.
